100 Blogs Later

I first started this blog on December 15, 2008. It was a continuation of my previous, failed blog, When the Dog Bites, When the Bee Stings. I started a new one because I wanted a fresh look. I wanted to leave all the heartache behind. So, my adventures got a new beginning and Me. Completely. was born. It has since then been tranformed into the blog we all know and love, Random Kills.

But where does the name Random Kills come from? Well, one day when I was blogging I thought to myself, "Gosh, my life is random." And here, for your pleasure, is an except from that very blog:
" I've about had it with random. Something effin' better be wrong with me or I'm never seeing another doctor again. I can just outright die. I don't care. Because they WON'T be able to find a cause. RANDOM IS GOING TO KILL ME!"- May I Have Your Attention Please!, February 10, 2009

But Susan, what are your favorite memories from this blog? Good question. And I intend to answer that for you now.

My 100 Favorite Memories:

1. "The court date is set for January 6th AKA Epiphany for those of you playing along. I got served on the 10th of the month, giving me 15 days to answer. 15 days from the 10th? Anyone? Anyone? CHRISTMAS! Yes. Christmas. And Epiphany is how many days from Christmas? TWELVE! Epiphany's sometimes called Twelfth Night. It's when the wise men blew into Jesus' life...finally. So...what is it with this guy and the holidays?"

Why this made the list: It makes me laugh. Why? Because 1. it has a Ferris Bueller reference that almost nobody will catch and 2. how non-chalantly I talk about the wise men.

2. "Let me see...I found out the name of the hottie across the street. Philip. He's a freaking engineer! I loves me some engineers! I just like saying "engineer". Say it. It's fun!"

Why this made the list: ENGINEER! Nuff said.

3. "Mai fun is my new fave. I really prefer the Singapore, but I don't eat meat any more so I got the veggie kind. It was kinda lacking in veggies though. And the steamed veggies came with tofu. WTF, dude? I did NOT order tofu!"

Why this made the list: I think this is the first time I use "WTF?" in a blog.

4. "Still didn't get my ribbon up. Lost the bow. Har. I'm amazing. I know. My ability to lose things is like no other I have ever known. I set things down and lose them in seconds. I amaze millions (well, maybe not that many) with my abilities to INSTANTLY lose stuff. I should go into showbiz. Really."

Why this made the list: It just did. OK?

5. "Jackie + Hyde is so much better than Jackie + Kelso."

Why this made the list: "Obsessive much? They're characters on a T.V. show"- my exact thought after writing this

6. "Velveeta is a superior cheese tyvm."

Why this made the list: Because it's true. The end.

7. "Yeah. I'm pretty random lately. I know you had to notice. Not that I've blogged enough for you to notice. But I expect you to notice anyway. Ha."

Why this made the list: It mentions that at least I am noticing how random I am.

8. "Our neighbor caught the shrimp in June. Six months is still fresh, right?"

Why this made the list: I still have no idea

9. "I had started the tradition of waiting until Twelfth night and saying it was the Three Wisemen, but because I don't homeschool, I really can't expect them to not know about Santa. So, I was defeated by the power of conforming."

Why this made the list: CONFORM OR ELSE!

10. "Anyway, the kids had a mish mash inside picnic for lunch. I gave them Velveeta chunks, raisins, chicken nuggets, french fries, cheese taquitos, Capri Sun, RitzBits peanut butter sandwiches, apple dippers, caramel sauce, and graham crackers. I think that was it. We had a small amount of everything so it isn't like they got a whole lot. Like the french fries, for instance. They had like 20 between the three of them. They each had one taquito. Small portions, so it sounds like a lot."

Why this made the list: Because I am creative, and you aren't!

11. "But they did include a certain of age Jonas Brother....Shut-up, he's adorable!"

Why this made the list: He's still adorable. I don't care.

12. This entire entry: The Holidays Are Almost Over

Why this made the list: It includes its own list. Go read it. It's awesome.

13. "Went through like a bajillion boxes of clothes today. Found an entire winter wardrobe for Jayde. SCORE! Don't have to go shopping for her now. Any way I can save money is a plus. Also, my grandma found my AT&T rebate card. I have $33 left on it. SCORE AGAIN! Now, I just have to get up off of my butt and mail Christmas cards. Haha. And a box for Jess. And some clothes to Brandie. And some clothes to Meagan. And. And. There goes my whole $33. Which reminds me, I need to finish and send off CK's notebook. FUCK! I need more time in a day! Or I just need to not procrastinate as much. Yes. That sounds right. "

Why this made the list: It's amazing how easy it is to please me.

14. "We're having chilli for dinner tonight. Chilli is love. We've got cheese and corn chips and oyster crackers to go with it. YAY!"

Why this made the list: See? Easy to please.

15. "Of this I am sure."

Why this made the list: Boy Meets World reference I am sure nobody will get.

16. This whole entry: Inspiration Time

Why this made the list: Because it rocks! It includes questions and answers. And it was one of the "funnest" things I have done this year.

17. "It's almost like DisneyWorld. They have a huge display with taxadermied animals. They even have a POLAR BEAR! It was caught in Alaska in 1970. That was my favorite."

Why this made the list: Polar bears are hot!

18. "I found a tent with CUPHOLDERS! "

Why this made the list: Cupholders! In a tent! I feel like more people should be concerned about this.

19. "I figured out that I can French braid."

Why this made a list: I impress me sometimes.

20. "Jayde helped me push an empty cart around Wal-Mart. We had a system, and I only ran into a pole once due to looking at her. We were chanting. "Big step, big step, big step. Turn, turn, turn turn turn. Big step, big step, big step. Stop." I had her taking as big a step as she could. Then when my back starting to hurt, I told her I couldn't make it. And she goes, "Whew, I tired." So we collapsed on the floor. Yeah, we got some stares, but I didn't really mind. Nobody in our party minded."

Why this made the list: Jayde is cute.

21. "Camy was walking by my mom who had a scooter. She loves helping her gran. She felt like such a big girl. Just about the only thing she didn't grab for my mom were the cokes. I got those. She didn't want them to land on her face. She ran off when I reached for it and goes, "Not my face, not my face!" What a card!"

Why this made the list: Camy is cute too.

22. "I am so anxious/nervous for the 6th, I wish it had already happened. I will sleep so much better with all of that figured out/ handled. I will lose so much stress once I know my girls are taken care of. I seriously would not be able to live with myself if I had just rolled over though. I am not a dog. I do not take orders so easily. I do not roll over on command. "

Why this made the list: Let me repeat: I am not a dog. I love that line.

23. "They are in love with Po. Don't blame them, though. Pandas are fucking hot. Well, Po is hot. Real pandas are just adorable. Don't think I'm into beastiality or anything. No. I wouldn't do that. EW! NASTY! Perish the thought. You nasty!"

Why this made the list: Kung-Fu Panda reference + That's So Raven reference = hawt

24. "Got up before 7 two mornings in a row. DOES. NOT. WANT."

Why this made the list: I am not a morning person.

25. "On a different note, I need a cure-all for dandruff. Mine is bad. "Mommy, it's snowing from your head." Yeah. I know."

Why this made the list: I am not kidding. Camryn actually said that to me. But I doesn't has no more.

26. "She's dressed as a ladybug right now. She's ladybug crazy! Which is a good thing, since she collects them. She tells me she is a Ladybug Princess all the time."

Why this made the list: Jayde is freaking cute!

27. "I'll just keep chanting "Go to school!" to myself. Pump myself up. Keep those bad thoughts out and not psych myself out. Just say no to self-sabotage!"

Why this made the list: Because it worked. I am now in the process of getting all of my school papers in order.

28. This entry: A Funny List

Why this made the list: LOLCats!

29. "I pretty much owe the progress I have made to Desi. I LURVE my Cajun Queen!"

Why this made the list: Desi is good for the soul.

30. "Kyle came by to fix something. Fine. But as he was leaving he says he wants to kiss the girls goodbye. WTF? He didn't even kiss them hello. I told him no. He just stared at me. I told him that he didn't need to kiss them goodbye when he didn't even kiss them hello (they were in the backyard playing). He just gave me this defeated look and went away. I WIN! I can't even believe I had the courage to do that!"

Why this made the list: First recorded victory over Kyle

31. "Right now I need to get my mind straight. Then I can think about others. This is solely selfish. I am aware, but if I don't take care of me, who will? I just need to take care of Susan right now. I need to get out of the habit of doing whatever I'm told."

Why this made the list: When I first realized I was a single human being and that I needed to take care of me.

32. "I just want to give a shout out to muh girls, Rach, Nik, and Desi. They are my guiding light. They are my soul. They are the very people that keep me sane. Don't get me wrong, I love my family, but these girls...I cherish them very much. So, go visit their blogs. Rach Desi Nik And while you're at it, check out the forum site where we all met, BijouxMB. "

Why this made the list: This is when I realized that there are people in my corner that want me to succeed and will back me up in everything that aren't my family.

33. "Talked to my mom. Seems ok with the big move. Says that if I think I need it then it's okay. I r teh confuzed. Y her not say I only fink it what I r needing? Weird."

Why this made the list: This is when I realized that my mommy will love me no matter what. And it has LOLSpeak.

34. This entry: I Wish...

Why this made the list: It's when I realized how precious life is, and how close the end really is.

35. "Oh yes. I am random. Oh yes. And you love it."

Why this made the list: See blog title.

36. "What else? I need some rum. Where's Captain Jack when you need him? Off pillaging, I suppose. Ah Captain Jack. I'll love you. And I'll never leave you. Don't care if you're a dirty rotten pirate. You look hot in guyliner. Oh Jack. Take me! NOW! Yo ho! Yo ho! A pirate's life for me! We'll have little pirate babies that'll be born with perfectly lined eyes. Oh yes. I secretly think you are part cat. >_< " Why this made the list: Pirate ramblings are always fun. 37. "might be going to LaLaLand? I dunno. It's definitely a start in the whole moving the heck outta here scheme. I think it's in the opposite direction, though. Might have to switch to the one in Covington? Eh. Whatever. I've always loved Lafayette. And ULL is there. -eyebrow raise x2- Jonathan anyone? Haha." Why this made the list: Jonathan. As in, the guy I met at DisneyWorld. Haha. 38. "I think I'm gonna have to pursue things outside the realm of pharmacy for now. It's not what I REALLY want." Why this made the list: This is when I finally realized that no, I don't want to be in a pharmacy for the rest of my life. 39. "A nautical star. A nautical star means "guidance". It is often used for sailors. And my grandfather (R. I. P.) was a sailor."

Why this made the list: It's when I figured out what I want my first tattoo to be.

40. "I just want everybody to go to bed and shut up."

Why this made the list: Not sure. It tickled my funny bone, though.

41. This entire entry: How Much is That Doggy in the Window?

Why this made the list: DOGGIES!

42. "I'm sick of bitches. SICK! We're all in hard times. ALL. OF. US. You are NOT alone. I know you feel like it, but you aren't. I. DON'T. HAVE. A. JOB! "

Why this made the list: Because I still feel the same, after all this time. And it was really only directed at one person, and they don't get it.

43. This is a two-fer.
"How the hell am I supposed to GET the experience if nobody will freaking hire me? HOW?"
"And I wonder if anybody knows how damn annoying it is to hear about all these people that are looking for pharmacy techs. Do they realize how stupid THAT makes me feel? "This company, this company, and this company are looking for techs. Why can't you find a job?" I DON'T KNOW! OK? I JUST DON'T KNOW! "

Why this made the list: Because it's when I finally expierenced that old Catch-22 everybody talks about post-college.

44. This entry: Not Da Baby!

Why this made the list: It's Jayde's 3rd Birthday entry. And look! Baby pictures of Jayde!

45. "I wanted to look at Stan's tattoos. If he's doing my phoenix tattoo, I have to check him out. He's gonna draw it up for me too. Because I say so."

Why this made the list: I haven't even gotten my first tattoo and I was thinking of my second one.

46. "I've driven her Durango around town, I just have to learn to Interstate with it. That could take a while. That thing is el huge! And you thought the Hummer was big. And it still might be, but these wheels are almost as tall as Jayde. And she's no shortie. She's 37", maybe 38" So, these wheels ain't small, by any means. The top of my Avenger, the TOP, comes up to her door, like the middle of her door. OK? And I almost fall out of the thing any time I get out. And getting in? Fahgetabouit! I has to climb in like a kid. She needs running boards like whoa. Oh yes. Durangos are scary creatures. I kid you not."

Why this made the list: It talks about me driving an SUV. Because I have been so gung-ho against them for so long. Haha.

47. "Jayde decided she was a cat today, so I made her strip naked. She cried. We talked and now she's decided that she is a little girl. I told her all of the things that cats can't do. You should have seen her face. "No cheese?!" I'm a mean mommy, I know, but it worked. No more cats. It all started because she was dumping coke onto the window seat and licking it up. Gross!"

Why this made the list: Because all this time and she hasn't ever gone back to wanting to be a cat.

48. "Living happens when you take care of yourself. "

Why this made the list: Guess.

49. This entry: It's Fun To Plan

Why this made the list: Because I love to plan

50. This entry: Just More Plans!

Why this made the list: Ditto!

51. This entry: Step Into the Boudoir

Why this made the list: Double ditto!

52. "Today Camy decided to paint my fingernails. She did pretty decent even though she did it her own way rather than the "right" way. Haha. She painted them like you would paint a picture. LOL So cute! How many five-year-olds can claim they painted mommy's nails? Not many."

Why this made the list: Pride.

53. "If your kid has bugs, whether tangible or not, don't send them to school. "

Why this made the list: Because of how frustrating it is when your kid gets infected because people send their kids to school JUST to get rid of them

54. "Thick green mucus is NOT your friend. It is EVIL! EVIL! "

Why this made the list: EVIL!

55. "Camy ended up tossing her cookies and spiking a 102 temp at about t minus 1 hour. And what did she throw up? Something I gave to her at about 9:15. Gross. It just sat on her tummy for freaking SEVEN hours! EW! "

Why this made the list: Vomit!

56. "Still don't see the point in celebrating the day the man got beheaded with symbols of love. I DON'T UNDERSTAND! "

Why this made the list: Because I still don't get it.

57. "So, I don't know how many of you noticed (my mom did), but I literally live in a hell house. Just look at my street number upside down, if you are privy to my address."

Why this made the list: Because 7734 rocks your socks off.

58. "And now, thanks to MJ, I AM thinking about moving to Bay St. Louis. I would like to move AWAY from the hurricanes, but closer to them could work too. I guess. LOL."

Why this made the list: Because MJ rocks!

59. This entry: Best. Song. Evar!

Why this made the list: Because I need to remember to take this attitude. And this song rocks!

60. "I am actually crying and wanting to end this relationship before it gets started because he wants to take it slow and actually understands. I don't get me sometimes. "

Why this made the list: It's the day before I started dating Jessie.

61. This entry: What Susan Needs

Why this made the list: Because it's amusing.

62. This entry too: Proof Of My Rock Moves

Why this made the list: Because I'm kind of proud of it.

63. "Kyle called me this morning...uh...yesterday morning now, and said he would distribute my resume' to anybody he could. "

Why this made the list: It's one of the biggest mistakes I have made this year.

64. "I am geography fail."

Why this made the list: It's true. I failed almost any test in which I had to identify anything on a map.

65. "So, um, things happen so quickly around here it's pretty funny. Date = back on. LMAO. He'll be here in about 12 hours!"

Why this made the list: It marks the first time I saw Jessie in person in seven years.

66. "I'm way past weirded out when it comes to seeing him again."

Why this made the list: It shows how shy I can be even if I know somebody.

67. "I really just want Jessie to come tonight."

Why this made the list: It shows just how much I just wanted to get laid.

68. "Yesterday was pretty fun. I don't think it was as fun for Jessie. ROFLMAO So not going there. He would kill me! And I know he reads this, so, so not taking the chance. I mean, I love you, Jessie!"

Why this made the list: Because it's funny that after all that worrying over having sex with him on the first date, we didn't have any. And the fact that he wanted it sooooo bad, but I kept telling him we couldn't. I guess the secret's out now, huh?

69. This entry, or really the link enclosed: You Know It!

Why this made the list: My mommy's birthday!

70. This entry: Red Rebellion

Why this made the list: The Red Rebellion DVD shoot

71. "I think Jessie is more anxious about me getting my life together than I am. Although, I see his point. I love that we can be so honest with each. And I love that he totally called me out tonight on my certain habit."

Why this made the list: Because it shows how much Jessie cares/cared about me and my life. And that makes me happy even though it ended.

72. "Haven't talked to Jessie in a while. Kinda bummed about that. I really want to hear his voice. I keep thinking about the other Saturday and my heart keeps doing the butterfly thing. I miss him!"

Why this made the list: Because it's a couple of days before I drove all the way to McComb, alone. It's also two days before I saw Jessie in person for the last time.

73. "So, anyway, it looks like my only job for now is going to be school. I'mma talk it over with the mom this weekend and then see if I can start in the fall. The government/court considers school a job. So...maybe...I'm thinking fashion merchandising."

Why this made the list: When I finally realized that my only future was in going to school and also when I finally decided on a major.

74. "Jessie told me that we need to take this thing easy. Make it more casual. And that basically, I am not marriage material. Because I've already had kids and he feels like he's paying for my sins. And that he wants a clean slate."

Why this made the list: Not a good memory, but a memory nonetheless. This is when I realized that I would have to be careful about the boys I got involved with. Also when I realized that maybe Jessie wasn't right for me. BIGGEST. FEAR. REALIZED.

75. "Well, I guess I'm becoming less and less controlled by my computer and more and more controlled by my phone."

Why this made the list: This is when I realized I could blog by phone.

76. "But thanks to Tiana, I figured out what exactly what went wrong and why. "

Why this makes the list: I started to reconnect with Tiana again, and realized just how much she rocks (which I think I already knew).

77. "So, I don't think I can make it until my Canadian vacation in July. "

Why this makes the list: The day after I decided to visit Tiana and Curtis

78. "Children are the best teachers, though. Looking at the world through the eyes of one of my babies will show you so much! I can guarantee that. Now, I know why so may people love early childhood development."

Why this makes the list: The day I discovered the REAL reason to have children

79. "Went to the unemployment office today."

Why this made the list: It was a week after I just gave in and reached out for help with the job/money thing.

80. "Took the kids to the park. That was quite the adventure."

Why this made the list: Because the park adventure was strange and frustrating but also funny.

81. " I tell her to walk until she falls out. So she stops about three steps later and procedes to "fall" onto the ground."

Why this made the list: Because Jayde is a drama queen.

82. "Wes and his family were in town today. He's so grown up since entering the Marines. "

Why this made the list: Because time flies.

83. "The only thing Camy can hold down is Sprite. Can't even hold down the anti-nausea medication. How fun!"

Why this made the list: Because that ordeal pretty much made me able to handle puke.

84. "Made meatball soup tonight. "

Why this made the list: It's the first time I ever cooked without a recipe

85. "No unemployment benefits for me. Just leave it at that. But the reasoning behind it may keep also keep me from getting a job. "

Why this made the list: Because this is when I realized that working for the Lake did more damage than good.

86. " I have an ovarian cyst as well. An ovarian cyst that is mimicking a pregnancy. An ovarian cyst that is causing me and has been causing me a lot of pain. An ovarian cyst I want gone. Now."

Why this made the list: Because it's the first time I've ever had an ovarian cyst in my life.

87. "And we were talking to him and he's like, "There are like 500 people in here and not enough of us." "

Why this made the list: Because it's when I decided to start applying to retail jobs, part time.

88. "...when it occurs to me that I am really pretty. Yes, you heard that correctly (or read that, really). I actually think that I am pretty. And that, my friends, is a pretty awesome feeling. "

Why this made the list: Obvious reasons. And it makes me feel good.

89. " And honestly, it was the best gift ever, for me. Instead of spending my birthday adventure to DisneyWorld having fun, I got to spend it worried about money while trying to fake being happy. I almost missed out! Thank God P was there to give me that, though. I owe it all to him."

Why this made the list: Because it shows that I am still quite bitter about the way I was done at the Lake.

90. "He doesn't make the rules, and fortuneately enough for me, he doesn't bend them either. Thank God for people lilke him! "

Why this made the list: Satire rocks your socks. Even if it's not completely done right.

91. This entry: Damn Boys!

Why this made the list: Because it's when I really decided that I AM a survivor. I am stronger than that, but that it's also OK to cry once in a while.

92. This entry: Some Things You Do For Love, Love, Love

Why this made the entry: Because I believe in love, and feel like people make love harder than it has to be. No, Lady Gaga, if it's rough, it is NOT fun!

93. "To the dumb men who think I am looking for a new father for my children and financial support for myself: you are misataken."

Why this made the list: Because it's when I realized what it must look like for a single mom of two without a job to be looking for a boyfriend.

94. "I hope it's ok I happened upon your blog!" -Nik

Why this made the list: Because it is always ok if you happen upon my blog

95. "I don't think I could ever go without myspace. I'm quite addicted." -Vicki

Why this made the list: Because myspace, it will suck you in

96. "What is Sutan?"- Nik

Why this made the list: Because I just can't fathom why somebody WOULDN'T know who Sutan was. For those of you still confused, and also for my pleasure (because as gay as he is, I still think he's hot) THIS is Sutan: (picture to come) visit his site: www.sutanamrull.com

97. "I like the firearm check-in. You know you live in the south when you have one of those lol. "- Vicki

Why this made the list: Thank you! THANK. YOU!

98. "Get to work on the short chick clothing line. I'll gladly model. My short ass is sick of searching for clothes that don't fit."- Desi

Why this made the list: Because this is the comment that jump started my heart.

99. "Big change, but sometimes change is awesome! " -Desi

Why this made the list: Because it's supportive. And I expect nothing less of Desi.

100. "YAY for standing up for yourself. You are awesome! :) I am happy for you. " - Rachel

Why this made the list: Because my victories are felt by everyone.

BONUS MOMENTS:

Because it just wouldn't be my blog if I didn't have bonuses.

1. "Aww, Susan! I always find you in the perfect times it seems. Ah! I have "goosepimples" as one little girl called it today. *HUGS*I love you. For real. No jokes. NO mess. Except for the occasional typo and my horrible text-slang. Hehe.I think you are right, though. Now is the perfect time for you to be selfish, and heck, I kind of want you to be for once. :)" -Nik

2. "I hate how time pulls people apart and not together, unless they seem to work to stay together. It seems... almost opposite of what nature should do, doesn't it? Or hearts should do. Ugh, I'm babbling.I'll be your sister."- Nik

3. "I have some "redneck maffia" connections. lol. It's more or less some rednecks who are Marine reserves that will do anything for a 6 pack. Ah yes, the good ole boys. Drives big trucks. With a shotgun behind the seat. Prolly the kind of guy I'll end up marrying lol. Just say the time and place. I'll even help hide the body. And he'd be clear out in the gulf in 2 days. No one would ever suspect a thing. lol. If only it were that easy." - Vicki

4. "You just let me know when you get all of this done so I can move my ass in, lol."- M.J.

5. "I lurve you!"- M.J.

6. "Idk what to tell you about the rest, dude, it'll all come in due time."- M.J.

7. "That's what I love about a good boyfriend. Able to call you out and make you tell them the truth, because they're willing to do that for you."- M.J.

8. "One day we will be blind and miserable together, haha."- M.J.

I think I am sensing a pattern...

9. "it's baby steps, honey. you CAN be who you want to be, who you used to be. one small step at a time."- Tiana

10. "either way, you are STRONG, you are BEAUTIFUL and you are downright amazing. don't ever forget it."- Tiana

11. "I wasnt lying when i was trying to empower you, you have to get motivated in things.you have to be strong in life.YOU CAN NEVER STOP.Dont let your armor get down."- Jessie

12. "so how about I just tell you instead that I love you and think you're beautiful and give you a huge long distance hug?? *HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUG*"- M.J.

13. "I had the same revelation earlier today. Although, mine was really just that I have a really pretty face. And it wasn't a post-shower picture - it was a picture of me at the bar. lolol" -Angela

14. "men just never understand."- Courtney

And now, ladies and gentlemen, that concludes this blog! Here's to 100 more entries!